Drawing It Out
by ame shiroi
Summary: A few short bits about some of the relationship dynamics in Team Kakashi. Naruto is ill, Sakura doesn't have a clue and Gaara in all his awesomeness helps her get one. NaruSaku. R&R please.
1. August 16

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or anything associated with it. The only thing I own is this plot line.

August 16th

I am a liar. I lie to myself daily. I lie to others daily. I lie to the world. Sometimes I wish someone would be attentive enough to recognize it.

Kakashi probably knows. He can see straight through me. Heh, even without the sharingan. But for some strange reason, he asks no questions, which surprises me. Kakashi always asks questions. It's who he is. Maybe they're more internal. He studies me a lot. As if he's waiting for my next move. Or more likely, waiting for me to finally go insane.

Sai doesn't know, I'm fairly confident of that. The poor boy barely grasps what the word 'happy' truly means. But he also studies as if waiting on my final move, too.

Naruto definitely doesn't know. In fact, he's the one I've lying to the most (and is the easiest to lie to). But he looks at me with sadness in his gaze.

At the moment, my two biggest lies are 1) I love Sasuke and 2) I do not love Sasuke. Strange huh? No, no, it gets better. The latter gets more true every day. Sometimes, I find myself despising him for what he did to us. We were once the people closest to him and he stabbed us in the back. But on the other hand, I know I'll always care for him. I'll never stop looking out for him, as a friend.

At this point, I can't even not care for Sai, bastard that he is. He's almost worse than Sasuke himself in the teme department. Lose a teme, gain a teme. It's like that old saying 'when god closes a door, he opens a window'.


	2. August 18

August 18th

I found myself studying the faces of my teammates today. Not that unusual, I guess. Their features are terribly familiar to me now and in some way comforting when I think about them. But today I began to see new things. Things I'd never noticed before.

Some Kakashi's hair wasn't that bright, identifiable silver, but now partially streaked with dull gray. His greetings are as cheerful as ever, but there's always been a certain weariness around him I hadn't noticed as a child. He seems to savor the rare moments we have together when we're not on missions.

I glimpsed a couple of fine frown lines in Sai's forehead and around his mouth. Despite this, he's a little more open with us everyday. Smiling, painting, training. Or just staying still. _Relaxing_. He, too, savors the rare moments.

I had to mentally sketch Naruto for the longest time.

Unkempt blond hair falling into deep, clear blue eyes. The whisker marks on his cheeks told of Kyuubi, a reminder to me and others that those marks could widen and those blue eyes could turn feral red, he himself becoming nothing more than a wild animal.

But that's not Naruto, I told myself sternly.

A wide, smiling mouth which laughs and grins so easily is set under a sharp nose. A fox nose, I thought, grinning.

They're endearing, to me. These things in the faces of people so precious in my life. Even Yamato, who I haven't seen in nearly two weeks. Purely endearing. Even if Kakashi analyzes to much, even if Naruto is clueless, even if Sai is emotionally defective.

I love them. They make me who I am.

In a few days, it'll be Temari-san's birthday. Naruto and I are traveling to Suna to surprise her. We both got her gifts, but I think he's really there to check on Gaara. He's been feeling tired lately, even after Shukaku's removal.

Regardless, I know we're both glad at the thought of seeing them again. I think the last time we saw each other was...four months ago, in May. Kankuro's birthday.

I get a strange feeling, now and then. Especially around Naruto. But I don't know if I should ask. Sometimes irritation takes him over and he goes off by himself for a long time. Maybe...I dunno. Maybe Naruto isn't checking on Gaara...maybe Gaara's checking on him...


	3. August 23

August 23rd

Temari-san was delighted with our gifts. But I am still so worried about Naruto. He's been with Gaara almost every minute since he got here and I still don't know what the matter is. I've hardly seen Naruto more than ten minutes. I feel so helpless and I _hate_ it! I'm debating on whether or not I should ask Gaara about this.

Would he tell me?

I don't think so, but I have to try.

Naruto likes to pretend everything is okay (much the same as I do). He would never yell me if something were really wrong with him. I pray this time there really is nothing wrong.


	4. August 24

August 24th

I walked into Gaara's office this morning, clenching my fists so tightly I thought I'd break something.

"Um, Gaara-san?" I asked tentatively, hoping my heart wasn't really pounding that loudly.

"Yes?" Gaara has a voice that suggests patience. Heavily perfected patience and acquired calm. Was this the same person who nearly killed me almost four years ago? Hardly. That helped me get the courage to look for my voice again.

"I-I wanted to know...is-is there something wrong with Naruto?"

I watched an emotion flash across his pale blue-green eyes, but I was so unused to anything but absolute calm in his face, I was unable to read it before it disappeared. He answered with an even, unhindered voice. "Iie."

I lost it. I completely lost my temper – which, while he'd no doubt heard about it, he had yet to experience such joy.

"Tell me the truth!!" I screamed, pointing a finger at him. "You're lying to me! Tell the truth!"

I rubbed my wrists in irritation, feeling them itch suddenly. I felt small grains of sand under my fingernails. "Oh no." I murmured, realizing that kind of trouble my mouth may just have got me in. Gaara's sand tightened ever so slightly against my wrists and ankles.

He moved next to me and leaned toward my ear. "Listen very closely, because I will only discuss this with you once. Nothing is wrong with Naruto. He's just feeling...unwell. He thought I could help his state of unrest." He paused, narrowing his pale eyes, then pulled me closer. Even then, he spoke so quietly I could barely hear him."Be careful. He may begin acting a little strange. Well, _stranger_. But remember, no matter how odd he acts, he's still Naruto."

I narrowed my eyes, wheels beginning to turn inside my head. "Does this have something to do with the Kyuubi?"

He nodded, then simply released my ankles and wrists with a wave of his hand.

'Be careful.' He'd said. Be careful for what? For Kyuubi? No, he said 'no matter how strange Naruto acts, he's still Naruto.'

What did he mean?

Naruto?!

Should I be afraid of _Naruto_?!

No. I could never be, Naruto would never do anything to hurt or frighten me, I'm sure. _Very_ sure.


	5. September 20

September 20th 

I've been very busy at the hospital. I don't get home until late, sometimes not even till the next morning. Nothing incredibly exciting has happened since my little 'chat' with the Kazekage. Naruto still seems tense, though. Occassional visits with Lee-san and Kiba help a lot. They make him more..normal. More lively, more like himself.

He's gotten clumsy. Clumsier than usual. I mean. And whenever we're on a mission and it's time to go to sleep, I sometimes...hear things. Normally, I would chalk it up to a wet dream, but I think he's having nightmares.

He talks in his sleep, groaning and thrashing. He sweats a lot and sometimes he seems to be in severe pain. Kakashi talked to him about it once. He just told him it was a regular bad dream and he didn't even remember what it was. All this sad with laughter and a sunny smile.

How painful it must be, to keep all your pain inside yourself, coiled into a tight ball that grows bigger and bigger.

It hurts.

Everyday it gets more painful to see him this way.


	6. Mysteries Revealed, Demons Concealed

Mysteries Revealed, Demons Concealed

I placed my glowing green palm along the viciously colored fist-sized bruise on Naruto's cheek. It looked horrible. There were scratches on his arms, too, but I pretended not to notice.

"How did you get this?" I asked, cocking my head curiously. He lied. I knew when he opened his mouth he was going to lie.

"Ahh, you know how clumsy I am." he said, smiling at me as I finished. "I didn't even feel it."

"You have a fever." I said with a frown, laying the back of my hand against his forehead. "You should be resting, not squirming around."

It was true, his skin burned, but he was unable to sit still. Just sitting on the exam bed, he fidgeted constantly, all while his blond hair was slick and plastered to his forehead. I gently brushed his bangs away from his eyes, lost in thought. Naruto shuddered and gripped the edges of the bed so hard jis knuckles turned white and the steel table shuddered along with him.

"Naruto? What's wrong?! Naruto!!"

His head bowed for a moment and the response I got was a low growl. When he stared back up at me, his eyes were demonic-red.

He hissed in self-contempt and one of his hands latched onto my wrist. Those crimson eyes were wild and slightly delusional. Something that felt like hot coals was stroking my cheek. I sighed in nervous relief, realizing that it was only Naruto's feverish hand. I gently squeezed his shoulder, trying to get him to let go of my wrist, but he didn't.

Another growl came from his throat and he pushed me away using unexpected force that made me end up against the opposite wall. Chakra spilled from his body, tainted red-hot. More chakra then he should even have in his body, even with the allowances of Kyuubi. "Run." he rasped out at me. "Run away."

He screamed and clawed at Kyuubi's seal, the sound heartbreakingly lonely and sad. "_Go!! _Run away, now!!"

I couldn't_. _He was in _pain._ I couldn't just leave him there, screaming in agony with blood dripping down his hand as his clawed fingers continually scratched at the seal. He leaned against the counter for support and he drew his head back. An image of his head slamming into the counter, blood everywhere, hazed over my vision and suddenly I knew where he got those bruises.

I ran to him, wrapping my arms around his burning, feverish body. Just as I had nearly five years ago when Sasuke first lost control of his curse seal.

Tears almost as hot as his skin ran down my face. I buried my face in the crevice between his neck and shoulders. "Please stop, Naruto!" I begged. "Don't hurt yourself anymore!!"

His body went rigid and he shivered violently. "Don't." he choked, trying to push me away. "Don't come near me."

He whirled, grabbing me by the waist. To my horror, Naruto lifted me off the floor like a toddler. He groaned in pain and shook his head vigorously. "I'll hurt you." he groaned again and his grip around my waist tightened painfully.

"You won't." I coaxed. "You haven't hurt anyone yet, only yourself. Please don't keep hurting yourself! Let me help you! Please, Naruto!"

He relaxed his grip on me, chakra fading around us. His strength left, but he held to on me as he fell, falling on his back to cushion me. "Sakura-chan, I-I'm so sorry."

He – he was hugging me...he held me and I started sobbing.

--

I was horrified. I could've killed her. I could've _raped_ her. I could've raped Sakura-chan...

A bitter liquid rose in the back of my throat. This was all Kyuubi's fault. Kyuubi and his goddamn insistence on having a 'mate' or whatever the hell he called it. Not that he was picky on or anything. Anyone would do for him. But I'm a bit more selective than that.

I couldn't stand being inside my own skin, with Kyuubi hissing in my ear about how hot she'd be naked. It's disgusting. **I'm** disgusting. I knew what I had to do, even though it would hurt her.

I pushed her away forcefully. As of now, I'm cutting the bond. I can't risk this happening again. "Get away from me."

--

"Get away from me." he growled, pushing me away. Just like Sasuke.

"Naruto, _please_ –."

"Go away." he snapped sharply.

"No." His eyes met mine and my voice grew stronger. "No! I'm not leaving you! I won't let you push me away like _he_ used to!!" The words caught in my throat. "I'm still here, Naruto..." I held my arms open helplessly. "...can you see me? I'm here. I'm right **here**."

I hugged him around the waist, tears still streaming down my face. "Please see me. I'm here because I want to be. I care about you, Naruto. I care about what happens to you!"

I felt arms around my shoulders. "I've always seen you, Sakura-chan." he murmured. "But can _you_ see _me_? The real me?"

I glanced up at him. He still had red eyes, the whiskers on his face were wide blocks and his teeth and nails were long and sharp. "This is me, Sakura." he said sadly "Do you see me?"

I surprised us both.

Impulsively, I placed my arms around his neck and pressed my lips to his. His response was immediate. Naruto's tongue touched mine and a shiver went down my spine. I ran my tongue lightly over his pointed teeth and stroked the wide marks over his cheeks.

"Of course I see you, silly boy." I murmured, running my fingers through his thick blond hair. Chakra flowed around me, circling me possessively. It was infused with a hot, wild desire. Kyuubi. Kyuubi was the one who'd been tormenting him, I knew that now. So what was he doing?

--

I couldn't control it. The Kyuubi, and more importantly, I, wanted her badly.

Even before Kyuubi started having 'issues' I'd wanted her. And I'd always loved her. That certainly hadn't changed at all. _**"Listen up boy." **_the annoying fox hissed. _**"As soon as you fornicate with this girl, she belongs to us, got that?"**_

I couldn't live with that. It's not my coice, after all. It's hers. "Sakura-chan." I half moaned as Kyuubi forced his demands more clearly, invoking images of hot flesh and naked bodies in my head. "If-if we do this, you're my...mate. I-I can't have anyone else, Kyuubi won't accept anyone else."

She looked up unblinkingly into my eyes, then kissed my neck and jaw. I was frozen in place. "Are you gonna stand there or make me your mate?"


	7. Once More, With Feeling

**Once More, With Feeling**

"I knew she would get him eventually." Gaara sighed, glancing down at the two bodies lying on the floor of the examination room, their naked barely covered by a small blanket they'd most likely stolen from one of the wide cabinets along the walls. "I just expected her to do it sooner."

--

I woke up with a breathing pillow.

I smiled as I made out the blurry outlines of messy blond hair and a strong, bare chest. How many times had he wanted more...? How many times had he roused me from a half-sleep by nipping my neck or lapping at my stomach.

Naruto had one hell of a sex drive and – this might just be wishful thinking – I don't think that it's from Kyuubi's influence, either. It's nice to be wanted. Not only loved, but desired, too. Every girl wants that. Naruto made both feelings clear on no uncertain terms last night. Several times, in fact.

My chest warmed up. He'd also made it clear that no other woman would be acceptable. In his mind, there was only _Sakura_.

My head jerked to the side at the sudden sound of someone clearing his throat. Godaime Kazekage...

"Ga-Gaara-sama." I stammered respectfully. His raised his nonexistent eyebrows at me.

"I thought I told you to be careful, not draw out his agony until he couldn't stand it anymore." he said bluntly. Gaara's mouth twitched at the corners and he hooked a thumb over his shoulder, pointing at the wall behind him. My panties!! My underwear laid in shreds at the base of the wall, beneath large marks in the sheet-rock, either torn or scratched there. _Oh my!_

I turned beet red and was no longer able to look Gaara in the eye. He seemed slightly amused by the whole ordeal. "You really shouldn't have waited so long, you know. Naruto is ever the self-sacrificer. Who knows what might have happened...?"

"What about you?!" I said, blushing furiously and forgetting about not looking him in the eye. "You never acted this way, how was I supposed to know what he was going through?!"

It was true. Even in a room with two very naked people (which I was extremely aware of at that point) Gaara was totally unaffected. He seemed to understand me.

Quietly, he said "I would not lower myself to staring at my best friend's girlfriend, Sakura. I like to think that I have better intentions than that." He forced a small smile. "Besides, drooling over you would be a death sentence now."

His eyes lingered over Naruto pointedly and I thought I might faint from all the blood going to my cheeks. "I suggest that you break off any other affairs with other men in your life, unless, of course, you want to see them pounded into a bloody pulp."

Pointing to an angry red mark on my shoulder, he said "You're going to need a bandage on that bite. Come see me after you've...recovered."

With that cheerful statement (or as cheerful as outwardly possible for the Kazekage to be) he walked back out the door, tossing out his last two cents as he left. "Oh, and I was supposed to tell you to get out of here, because you're 'scaring the nurses to death' according to Tsunade."

Naruto blinked his blue eyes up at me sleepily and he gave me a foxy grin as he recognized who was lying next to him. "Morning, Sakura-chan."

By now, I'd learned to understand what that particular look meant. I was absolutely sure we weren't getting out of here before round...what was it, ten? I winked at him.

"Morning, Na-ru-to." I drawled lazily. "Did you sleep well?"

His eyes swept over me twice. First with love, then with lust. "Very well."


	8. Famous Last Words

**TO ALL AME SHIROI READERS:**

I am very, very sorry but ame shiroi will not be writing any more.

Her real name was Amelie and she died in the fall. It was her request that I give you this news and I admit, I've put it off for a long time because I don't really like thinking about it.

Writing was her passion and she did it for as long as she was able and even let me help her when it became obvious that she wasn't as able any more. She used to say that writing was her addiction.

"Some people can't function without nicotine or cocaine or meth. I can't live without writing." she said. Maybe that was true. When even I couldn't help her any longer, that was when she died.

Your support and reviews brought joy to her on days when she didn't have a whole lot to be joyful about. For that, I thank you. I was sometimes her sister, sometimes her mother, sometimes her daughter, and always her best friend. I miss her, as I'm sure you'll miss her and the tales she told to entertain the world. Small in themselves, but very big things to her.

Amelie especially wanted to thank Kyoui-chan and Angelas for their continuous reviews and love. She almost cried when she saw Kyoui's picture for **Prevarication**.

AMELIE VIVIANNE BROWN

JUNE 1ST 1991 - OCTOBER 30TH 2008


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